Wednesday, March 25, 2009

The Pit of Depression/Negativity is Endless!

Well, people I'm back yet again with another thought. I guess as God deals with me more I have more thoughts, so I guess that means more

This is something that has been on my mind a few days now, and I feel like writing about it now. It's almost a continuation of Got Haters?(my last entry that was typed and not sent from my phone) Basically where I left off in that one was talking about negativity. I truly believe that depression and negativity are an endless pit! Well, why do you say that Mike?... Think about it: The more you worry about a matter, it seems like the worse it gets. The more you hate a job, the worse it gets. The more you say you're not a morning person, the harder it is to get up in the morning. And as I said in my entry titled Resolution, I resolve that when I begin to worry about a situation I will catch myself and say Lord, let your will be done. I resolve that I'm going to catch myself when I first stumble upon that pit of negativity, so that my climb out is not as steep! Woah... Think about that one for a minute. The more you fall into nagging co-workers, the more you fall into sorry baby's daddys, the more you fall into financial lack, the more you fall into gossip, the more you fall into speaking negatively, the more you turn away from God... The harder it is to climb out, the harder it is to be removed from the situation, the harder it is to get closer to God!

I will share a story with you(whomever the reader maybe) that I've shared with none but some of my clients and I think Felicia can remember the situation but didn't know how severe it was.
Last year in June, I wrote my first blog after my brother, Darrell had suggested it to me. My first blog was originally on myspace and it's entitled Life is Like Nike, Just Do It! (Go check it out on here if you haven't) Basically in that blog I wrote about being positive and not making excuses for yourself. There were a few people who read that and said that it was good, or that it blessed them. Now, all the way back last year the Devil probably saw what my writing would be today and begin to fight. Later on June 28th, my Father passed away. I then wrote a blog called My Profile Song, and at the time my profile song was I'll Be Praying for You by the Seven Sons of Soul. In the first month of me writing, I had written about 3-5 blogs. I was spreading all this good cheer and info and I was in a depressive state. I told Felicia, "I don't know what's wrong with me but it just feels like I don't want to do anything." The only time I felt like I was living is when I was at work with my clients, or when I made it to church. All the time I was at home, I felt empty. I had no energy, I didn't want to work out. I started to gain weight. I was sinking deeper and deeper into the Endless Pit of Depression & Negativity! I can remember Felicia asking me, "Do you think you're grieving internally, and it's just your body's way of telling you?" All I can remember thinking is that being from a huge family I had seen so much loss that I didn't think that was it. But now I know what it was, it was the Devil trying to hold me back from getting to that one Sunday morning in October when Felicia and I looked at each other and said today is the day we join our church! The Devil was trying to hold me back from all of the many blessings he's been restoring upon me! The Devil was trying to hold me back from writing these blogs to inspire, uplift and bless You! The Devil was trying to hold me back from the work that I'm beginning to do in my church! The Devil was trying to hold me back from the many great things God has planned for me that I don't even know of right now! And let me tell you the reason why I know it's an endless pit; I fell so far in it that I'm still shaking off the dirt from it even today!
So I write this blog simply to give everyone who reads it encouragement, to say Get Up Now from your Negativity before it turns into Depression. As my pastor, Bishop Jim Lowe sometimes say, I don't want to go through Hell to experience blessings while in this life. So I write this simply to warn you that if there is anything ailing you right now just simply give it to God, and be done with it. A scripture my pastor brought out: I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. (John 16:33) No, it's not always going to be easy. But if you worry or complain, it's not going to make the problem any better until God wants to fix it anyway. So line yourself up to make Him want to move a little quicker! As always may God Bless anyone who has, is and will read this. Continue to pray for me that God will keep dealing with me in a mighty way! I love you all!

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